I'm Your Azalea

Place me.
Pat me in.
Wait...
Drench me in love
Hydrate me
Coax me
Wait for me...
Wake me
Susurrame
Keep loving me...
Watch me sprout
Watch me unfold before you
Bask in my beauty
Brighten my days up
Now, let me watch your amazement...
But when I die, remember me
Because I'm product of your love and effort.
I'm your Azalea.

Phoenix

I've lived in the embers of what once was my heart for so long. I promised... No, I vowed to rid myself of my perception. My trusting nature nurtured my own demise. I sentenced myself to a life behind walls, guards; an armory at my beck-and-call to stun away any and all intruders. That's what you taught me to see any approaching figure as: an enemy. You approached me in the same way. You promised me happiness and laughter. You assured me that it wasn't going to be easy but you'd try. But you lied! You were dripping gasoline all around me. You distracted me with your eyes... your lips... your touch... You knew my weaknesses. You knew you were my kryptonite. But you walked away when I needed you the most, casually tossed a match behind, and left me for dead. You lit the fire that consumed me.

Had I been on the lookout, you wouldn't have gotten the chance.

But I am through with not allowing the world a glimpse of me. Not because that's the way I wish it to be but because this desheveled self, only a fraction of what I once was, is laying in her own ashes and cannot seem to find a way out.

But I tell you, tonight, I find the courage to rise up out of my ashes like a phoenix. I've surged my pain with my will and produced enlightenment, empowerment, invincibility.

I promised myself I'd rise someday...

that day has come.

My... Companions

Avoiding and running have been my companions until now. But come tomorrow, they will have no choice but to abandon me. Leaving me exposed. My deformed heart in hand, my broken soul trailing behind. I will have to face the very thing I have been running from.

Some friends avoidance and running turned out to be.

Inquietud

Yes, my post title is in Spanish. There's a reason. I'm digging deep into what roots me and I've had a look around. Spanish is a big part of it.

I hate when my father and I fight. Let me make the emphasis that needs to be made on that. I DESPISE when my father and I fight. He is the one person that I know will always be there for me unconditionally. When we fight, I feel like the ground gives way beneath me. My world stops for those moments and it sucks. There's really no other way to describe it. I feel unsettled by everything and everyone.